Sunday, January 2, 2011

Would you ?

Dear readers,

Time may fly so fast. As for today, he left to Sabah going for the National Service. Bet that who ever I am to him right now, I couldn't help worrying about him much. The last call really affect me until today. Even though I've been treated oh well I should say he didn't know to respect other people's feeling including me. He didn't even say sorry for what he's done and still don't realize he was wrong for being an ungentlemanly guy. He should feel wrong. He should. Argh, I feel that terrible right now. Very terrible. I don't understand myself for being upset, being stupid over jerks ( the most right word ) like that and being unworthy for my own self for sticking into the miserable I own until today. Uh, more than shits. Who ever I am to you, when ever I'm acting the very cold way when you started to contact me back, I couldn't deny the fact I was trying really hard to fight for the feeling and once again, I lost in the battle. I lost to myself again and that is really getting on my nerve. I failed to recover from him and it's a failure to stay strong when I burst out into tears right after he called. My bad isn't ?

However, my dear sweetie, I should admit that I am now worrying about you much. Worrying about your condition a lot.
Would you stay healthy ?
Would you harm yourself ?
Would you be okay there ?
Would you get along with other people there finely ?
Would you fall for any girl ?
Would you ?

The most thing that I'm scared of is I still don't feel like accepting you to be with others. I'm sorry. I just couldn't.

' dear god,

the only thing I ask is to hold him when I am not around,

when I am much far away from him,

maybe because he doesn't even care anymore,

and maybe because I do MISS HIM so much.

why is it my heart still wanna owning him?
Rasa macam kena electric current =.='
I MISS you and it's a SO MUCH.