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Sunday, August 19, 2018

Aha, nailed these cool-ly!

I've been waiting for this time to update my blog.

Alhamdulillah guys, I have submitted my final draft of my thesis last Tuesday! The feeling was incredible. Because right after I wrapped up my colloquium works, I speed up my writing and I worked like crazy. My thought is solely to finish off this thesis thing and I don't want to pay for my tuition fees haha. And yeah did it. Right now I am preparing my slides for pre-viva and still waiting for feedback from both my supervisors.

I wish to update this last month since I had much much stories to share. But the due date and my thesis flutter me a lot. These two years of my postgraduate life I think I experienced a great achievements during the latest colloquium held last month:

  • I was the editor of Postgraduate Magazine entitled 'Virtousi' which was launched at the Colloquium night. I worked on the layout, the page arrangement and even proof read some of the articles sent to me. I chose the concept and did some alteration too. I know it was so much works but I was really happy and satisfied with the final result. I used to dream of being a journalist to be honest, tv hosting and reporting. Hahaha. That is probably the hidden part of me. Simply I feel so expressive working on the magazine. I love it so much. That should be my precious baby after my thesis I reckon. I feel so proud of my co-editorial board member: Shahrain and the PGKOS committee. Alhamdulillah we nailed this pretty cool. 


The anonymous quote is originally mine so yeah not so anonymous anymore hehe. 
Here is the link. Feel free to read it since it's made to motivate and inspire people with our postgraduate activities :)

  • I represented postgraduate student in a forum with two other lecturers. The theme was motivation for postgraduate students. To be honest I was freaking out because I know my place and of course I am not that diligent enough to be up there. I don't even own a thesis at that time and that is the most anxious thing ever for a postgraduate students of course. But Alhamdulillah, I think I did a pretty good job in this 2 hours discussion. After all a forum is all about discussion and every voice matters. It is not sort of debate that you need to win an argument. So it was all based on your point of view. That's the beauty of discussion until I was questioned by a phd student on my credibility lol (I think I need to write entire post for this sebab banyak sangat benda nak bebel haha) Frank enough, that was the point when I think I need to blurt out everything without thinking. So my virtual friend, where were you? (I know we were disconnected for almost a year now, but you were the 1st one I thought of that time. Because I wanna do it comfortably haha)

The other two lecturers are extraordinary. Memang bagai langit dan bumi. 
Hahaha. But like Dr Naim always said, "You are nothing less than me. We learn from each other"
Those words were so heart soothing. Thank you dr. 
Also I've got so many supporters that day. Credit to Dr. Latif too haha.

  • I participated in 3 minute thesis and won first place! Alhamdulillah tsumma alhamdulillah. It was the first time me showing my unpolished public speaking skill in IIUM since I left school 8 years ago lol. I do not expect this would be such a plot twist cause the champion of this competition was there too. I was quite busy that week coz I attended a training program held in Bangi before the colloquium. Pretty much I barely had the time to practice. The thing is I prepared the text early and keep on murmuring the text while I was ironing and read my text before I sleep. That's was the only time I had. So yeah, hard work didn't betray :)



  • I was the multimedia PIC for the Colloquium night. So I did another fun thing again! :) I edited videos and prepare for the VIRTOUSI launching ceremony. Since I was part of the editing team, I look forward for that moment so much! and alhamdillah things went well again. I feel expressive again coz I chose the songs ensuring that theme that night could be delivered nicely. Worked well with my co-multimedia committee; Wanie! Setiap kali dengan wanie, mesti rasa tenang dan selamat haha.

I looked so pale I know. That's the beauty of my bare face. hahaha
Well, on occasion patutnya beregek la skit ye dak.
But seriously I was out of mood sebab balik pukul 5pm, 
lepastu rasa macam overused my body for the weeks and I reached my limit.
Balik bilik, took a brief nap then 6pm baru terhegeh2 nak mandi dan iron baju. 
6.30pm terus keluar dan get ready kat hall. Sempat edit lagi satu video masa niii
Okay panjang penjelasan kenapa aku keluar muka camni hahaha


Kulliyyah of Science Postgraduate family. 
I am quite reserve at some points but I am glad to meet such amazing and steel heart people.
Coz I know to get going of this degree needs more than intelligence.
Let's stay strong and keep going inshaAllah!

I think this should wrapped up my post tonight. 
Still, at this point I am patting my own self (since nobody is doing this haha) to let me know I can do the impossible. What an achievements. Good job dear self!

Friday, August 3, 2018

Desire vs true love

Back on my stable state.

Those shattered feelings are temporary alhamdulillah :)

Tapi yerla kan, kita manusia mana pernah perfect. Hari hari kita cuba untuk jadi yang lebih baik dan cuba bangun balik dan find ourself back apabila teruji dengan benda-benda yang melibatkan hati dan perasaan. Lepas sehari dua dah okay dah sebenarnya hehe. Aku dah kembali dengan agenda dan impian hidup yang lebih besar iaitu ingin membina generasi harapan. Generasi yang bakal menaikkan nama islam iAllah.

So let's focus on to be a better version of yourself.
Mari menimba ilmu, menjadi wanita yang berfikir.
Menjadi orang yang bermanfaat untuk orang lain dan untuk masyarakat.

Semalam sebelum tidur belek2 balik kata-kata dari yasmin mogahed. Lemme summarize it into a small passage.

She said that people are often confuse on hawa (desire) and true love. We ought to believe that our wife/husband are our true love and submit ourselves to them. Yes, they are real but that's not true love. True love is when we submit ourselves 100% to Allah SWT. Allah says in the book that Allah created you from yourselves mate so that you find tranquility in them (30:31). Real love brings about calm-not inner torment. True love allows you to be at peace with yourself and your god. Hawa will bring you miserable, you keep on chasing them but you'll never reach them. So what I felt must be bounded to my desire/hawa. It's normal and it's about how you take care of it.

So may Allah grant us someone who can eventually bring us closer to Allah swt.
Ameen