Pages

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

I feel STUPID.

What's more that I'm gonna write here. arhh, seems much2 updates right now. why ? because there's no one that i can share my life with. haha. The more i wait, the more I feel stupid right now. It's freaking damn stupid !! arhh.. *pissed off.

So people, why do i think in this way ? yea.. i know. It's a bad idea to think yourself i mean yea. at least respect myself for not calling me as stupid. but i really think that way ! GOSH. what am i doing now bloggy ? =.= so, this is the stupidity of mine ;

I received text from him...
"oit!"
I didn't reply. credit went off. so bia jea la.walopon dlm hati nie. AKU NK REPLY!!! Think that i can fight for the feeling.*Thinking what should i do. Hah, pergi mandi! haha. tue je la method nk hilangkn rase xbest nie.

*Tengah keringkan rambut..suddenly,
-New message received- 0_o dy hantar lg ?
"wan, raya tahun nie mcm mana? datang rumah aku ark ?"
ohh, kawan aku rupanya.xde kedit nie so..
"abah, jom pergi kedai. ika nk topup"
abah cakap ; nanti2, abah nk tgk brita nie.
aku ; alaa...lambat la cmnie. =.=

tiba2..right after that...AGAIN
-New message received-
"haiyaa..kawan aku nie sabar la..adeyh.."
o'oh, bukan kawan aku tp DIA.
"Eyt"
Erk, I feel that my legs are weak! Ish pehal mamat nie. so i've made up a promise to myself ;
"Ika, jgn mcg dy even da topup pon. paham ??"
I nodded.

*half an hour later.
"Ika, jom !"
alamak..abah da siap. cepat2. capai selendang, amik sweater. ahh, sarong aje lahh. kak yang kate dy nk ABC so dy dgn xmandi nye..capai towel ikot sekali.aduhh.smelly. ;p tp sudahnye, it's still me going out bought it for her. T.T
Reached petronas. Abah suh pergi isi minyak n beli topup utk abah, kak yang and of course me.
I top up right after that.
But the weird thing is.. I text him 1st. not my friend. Aiyoo..ape aku nihh.lupa terus psl mcg kwn aku tuh..

"Eyt, sorry. kedit xde td. baru je top up"
he replied.
"nk mcg dgn...trus top up ye?haha"
dalam hati aku ; mamat niyh. PERASAN betol ! Ish, geram betol aku. terus aku delete mcg tuh. tgh tahan geram niehh. sampai org JIMboy tue kasi aku ABC pon aku xsedar.aku igt aku xnk reply da. sbb geram. xpe la. aku lupa motif aku !

........Reply text kawan aku dlu....... =.=

pikir punya pkir.hurm..reply la. t aku plak menyesal.

"Ish, xde la. nk msg kwn ckp pasal raya. gpon baru pasan je mcg nie"
hurm. kelentong la skit.terpaksa. huk

"haha. R u trying to fool me sha ? I know you very well "
alamak..sudahh. dy patut nye da xigt ape2 psl aku ! dy yg plih xnk aku da. hurm..nie nk nangis nie. :(

aku pon dgn gagahnye ; " ey, btol la. sekarang nie mlm2 org letak phone dalam laci tau. xnk tgk phone punya pasal. "

huh, mmg btol pon. xpe, tgk.ape dy reply.
"haha. I've read ur blog la mkck"

eii..geramnye aku dgn pkcik tinggi n! hurm.xpe2.aku pon reply ;
"Alaa..mcm la dlm blog sha ade tulis. "I'll top up just to mcg you." ade?xde kn..haaa. ;p"
utk mnghilangkn rase aku yg tgh geram nie. mcm2 smiley la aku letak. :)

"Mmg la xde. but i know la..i always know."
aku dgr mcm tue trus aku rase sedey. erm, dy kenal aku lagi. erkk,, ika!!! tahan! tahan!

suddenly he sent me this ;
"sha..."
aku duduk, terus pegang dada aku. ish, rase cm kene current. =.=
"huh? yea..y?" i replied.
"sje..haa..ntah pe dy rase org pggil dy g2.haha."
tyme tue aku da rase aku cam org bodoh. dy treat aku mcm tue. nk main2 kn aku lagi ke? tolong la..i can't resist. I'm building the strength from zero, time dy layan aku mcm taik! but he ruined it all.

n..he did say this ;
"I want to make you feel better because I heard you are being so miserable"
aku da agk geram da time tu.ape?? do you think that I am THAT WEAK !??!
"xpe la. its ok. i don't want to burden you kalo btol xnk mcg.lgpon it's my miserable.not urs. and it isn't ur responsibility anymore to make me feel better"
he replied ;
"hey, it's mine when i'm the cause k? just enjoy it k? ;p"
arhh..how could i enjoy if my emotion is not that stable and i might FALL FOR YOU AGAIN? and with that smiley, i think he should put this smiley ' :) ' rather than ' ;p '. It does not make me feel any better.
i replied ;
"its my feeling. how sure are you i won't fall for you again ?n...it's a lot miserable to accept that you are going to treat me as a fren. because i've told ya..i'm still waiting."

guess what he said people? It's simple ;
" Then, keep on waiting. ;) "
I feel that i am very2 freaking damn so stupid ! ='(
"yea..till i met new guy i think. hahaha"
"it's up to you sha."
Aku rase makin bodoh! ahhh...!! hey, boy doesn't you get it ?? if you can resist seeing me with other guy, how could you expect the same thing from me?seeing you with other girl? do you think that i'm okay with that? NO, I'M NOT OKAY!!!

Well, the text ended up by saying that " I can't resist this conversation anymore and it's buhbye from now..tataa" still. he hadn't reply my last text no matter how many times i remind him to reply my last msg so that i won't wait. I don't know what's up with that guy. He comforted me in a lot different way. he shouldn't bring up the thing that he really want to take me away from sadness. He should not even remind me for what he used to call me before.he just has to approach me and started with something that might make me forget about it while texting him. I'm not only losing you but also bestfriend.


5 comments:

nur iqa said...

dat guy cari pasalll :)

Wan Syafiqa said...

hah. tau xpe ! aku geram btol...!! sabar wan.sabar !

Farah Ain Ubeyda said...

gilo la mamat nih. x fhm eden. wan, cn i shoot him? i got his nmberss. lalalalallalal

Wan Syafiqa said...

hahaha...ain3.
it's my pleasure for you to shoot him. shoot him right on the head. or the leg.bia pendek sikit! haha

Anonymous said...

eee, losernya that guy :)